A long rant. Feel free to skip.

Can't my kids catch a fucking break? Not only is Tall Andy off my list of approved kids - possibly permanently after what he did and what his parents are pulling - but Mister En gleefully informs me today he is a fan of the ganja. Gleefully. With great joy, and a wee bit o' trepidation because he knows this is BAD FOR HIM AND DOESN'T HE KNOW I AM A MANDATED REPORTER? (And while this, thankfully, doesn't fall into the "abuse" category, the "danger" category is slightly more nebulous.)

Boy is 13, and I'm sorry, but that is fucking young. (On another note, why the hell are kids so incredibly comfortable telling me of all their illegal activities and making racist jokes in my presence? Do I somehow look like I think this is oh-so-awesome? I think this is an instance where my youth works against me. No racism, child. And, yes, Asians are a race, Shy Girl.) So now, after fucking months of work getting Mister En to trust me and be willing to work with me, talk to me and somehow see me as a safe person, a safe place, someone who actually thinks he's worth a goddamn, I have to go to the fucking counselor and rat the little shit out.

I say this with love. And it's the right thing to do, but (and this is where I whine) I wish the right thing wasn't so fucking hard. And wouldn't set me back a million years with this kid. Fuuuuck. How do I get him to trust me again? Candy will only go so far.

Oh, and get this: his dealer? His older brother. Sigh, siblings. Isn't is nice how they help each other out? Fucker.

So I told him that the party line was that it was bad for him, and it makes you stupid, and that I knew people did this, but I had a few friends who got a little too happy on weed and were dumb dumb stoners. And that addiction is nothing to laugh at, and it is entirely possible. And blah blah blah. I mean, what can I say? He's 13. And, as much as it pains me to say, he thinks of himself as in charge of his life but he is far from it.

I am so angry, I really don't know who I want to hit in the face more, me, or the first dumbshit who let a little kid toke up.