Riiiight over my head.

In Which I Prove Just How Far Removed I Am From My Teens, Despite Barely Being Out Of Them. Relatively Speaking, That Is.

I got to work with Mister En in English today, instead of my usual study hall periods with him, and I, apparently, was determined to embarrass the shit out of him.

Scene: They're in eighth grade, so they're doing mythology work, and just learning about all the Greek gods and goddesses al momento. The homework was to make a Venn DIagram (two overlapping circles on two different topics/ppl, etc. The overlapping area is what these two things have in common, and other areas are for disparate characteristics.) about Poseiden and Zeus. Mister En got called on to put something up that wasn't already up, and, typically for him, protested.

Him: "I don't know what to put up!"

His English teacher doesn't really have the time to babysit him, wonderful though she is, and since I was covering for a Special Ed teacher today who just hangs out in that class during that period and helps out in general, I headed over to see what the problem was.

Me: Okay, [Mister En], whatcha got?

Him (whisper): Mumblemumblemumble.

Me: Uh. Okay...well, why don't you let me see? (I get the paper kind of shoved towards me, and, sure enough, most of what's on his paper is already up on the board.)

Me: Hey, [Mister En], what's this one? I can't read your handwriting.

Him (whisper): Mumblemumblemumble.

Me: ...What?

Him (whisper): MUMBLEMUMBLEMUMBLE.

Me: I'm sorry, could you say that again for me?

Him (in a whisper): THEY HAD MANY LOVERS.

For some reason, I completely blanked on the fact that 13-year-olds get friggin' embarrassed by anything pertaining to love or sex.

Me: Oh, great! No one else has that up there; why don't you put it up?

Him: I don't wanna.

Me: Come on, Ms. T asked you to go up to the board, don't be a jerk.

Him: I don't wanna.

Me: Go ahead, just put it up.

Him (whisper): I'M NOT PUTTING THAT UP THERE, IT'S EMBARRASSING.

Me, finally hit over the head with the clue stick: OHHHHHHHHHHH. Okay. (Mentally smacking myself.}

A minute later, when he's gotten away safely: You see, if I don't go up, I don't get in trouble.

I wish that sentence didn't encapsulate his entire outlook on school.